i could say this week is very hectic.... work in the morning, afternoon had to struggle with assignments... stress keeps piling up & couldnt really take a break & rest... its onli wednesday today & i realised how lethargic i am, waking up early morning & endure my day wif the tremendous amount of stress....

sometimes, i wonder wat's the point of taking myself so hard... i became so helpless at times like this... my temper has gone quite bad due to these stress... even raising my voice to my family when they kept pushing mi too hard....

so sorry if i sounded very dejected now... i really need to take a deep breath & perhaps stay in focus for now.... so tired now


"First Sermon"

At his first service, the new preachers sermon was extremely long and dull. As he preached, he drank from pitcher of water until it was completely gone.

After the service, someone asked an old woman of the church, "How did you like the new pastor?"

"Fine," she said, "but he's the first windmill I ever saw that was run by water."


i was so thrilled to hear tt transformers DVD are out in stores now... perhaps a long-awaiting period to get this in my collection... i bought the 2-CD special edition that costs $40... & im broke.... well, juz think its worth the money to get that to satisfy me....

i watched the featurettes last nite & it kinda amazed me to see the concepts that is done in the movie... the new concept arts of the new robots... from the making of the real world to the war between the autobots & decepticons... tts not all... the detailed animation of the transformation was the delicated works i ever seen... 38 hours of 3D rendering of the robots took in the scene blew mi off.... also the selections of the robots might made the movie more significant by the fact tt its the lst movie of Transformers..... & ya! the cars........ wow..... =)

ok. back to sch work.... gonna finish off my assignment... gonna due soon....


there's nothing more like a place to chill out at..... a half-pint heineken & a long island tea made my evening feels relaxed.... have been to shanghai jazz & lot stock wif ramesh & jinder.... but this place i went juz now was belonged to alan's fren.... the bar which opened a yr ago at far east plaza was indeed another nice place to hang out at..... but one thing abt it is that: alan's fren, loon, is a fan of heavy metal music.... so the atmosphere was filled up wif music from Guns & Roses..... well, its not a totally bad rock band i know of..... juz getting used to the place perhaps....

overall, i felt that the place was well furnished with the right ambience.... everything looks nice & the dark curtains reminds mi of shanghai jazz...... perhaps i might drop by someday if i happened to be at far east someday..... =)

well, back to reality.... lecture's in the afternoon tmr..... sianz....


new blogskin created.... a refreshing change for my blog....... decided to go white this time..... but its kinda cramped for the body content..... well, nvm..... =P


System Administration's assignments & homework r kinda jamming my brain now.... got real stuck in solving the problems.... tried so hard to figure out the solutions but seems tt everything is so unsure.... haiz.... nowadays i had been studying like mad.... couldnt really feel the weekend mood anymore when it comes to saturdays & sundays..... been meeting up wif jiaqian, soon jin & kevin for study group..... well, we managed to resolve our questions together, but the progress would probably be from 0% - onli abt 5%??? better than nothing.......... =P

im pretty desperated of getting my own ride to places, even to sch.... my mum wouldnt really let mi drive lst... perhaps her intention was juz to keepsafe my licence for few months lst..... but how would i gonna practise driving if she doesnt let mi..... yesterday i drove her down to west coast area to buy some groceries at sheng song, she kept nagging at mi non-stop, telling mi to speed up, dun make swift turns or sharp turns, asking mi to slow down..... kinda make mi nervous..... come'on... i had been driving my landrover in army for abt 2 yrs & now she's restricting my way of driving.... perhaps im kinda complacent, but she dun really need to "preach" when im driving rite? i know she doesnt like us nagging at her driving skills, but does she really need to do tt to mi???

argh.... @_@


well.... i passed my driving test juz this morning.... & guess wat?



i passed my test under the worst physical & mental condition.... & by the grace of God, i can finally tk a deep breath out from my torturing attempts...



i wasnt feeling very well early in the morning which i had a final lesson at abt 0640... i din sleep well the night b4... i was tied up wif work & studies the previous day... my energy was completely drained off..... feeling very very terrible then...... b4 the test, i told the tester tt i wasnt feeling very gd & i went to toilet & vomitted.... during the test, i pushed all my energy to concentrate & endure thru the test.....

everything went fine during the test.... my clutch & accelerator controls were doing gd..... but juz then, on the way back to driving centre, this red Mazda 3 juz swayed past my car... without giving way to mi.... i cut onto this lane too.... it was luckiy tt i drove fast in front, otherwise i'd hit onto him.... the tester was shocked too... even went to tell mi not to cut his lane....

at tt point, i was like, "siao liao la.... confirm fail wan..." my mood totally went downhill... i was telling myself if i failed, its tt stupid red car's fault.....

in the room, the tester mentioned tt particular mistake to mi.. but he said tt was nt my fault but i should slow down & let him overtake.... surprisingly, he even took down tt car's plate number!! hmm...... was he trying to help mi??? =P

after assessing my score sheet, he wrote "16" & marked mi a pass.... well, i was super thrilled tt i forgot my sickness......

b4 i left house, i prayed to God tt i will endure my strength & oso said a little prayer to my dad to give mi His blessings for safety & mercy upon the tester.... when my dad was around, he used to scold mi stupid for failing the tests... well, he has high expectations of mi when it comes to driving..... worst of all, i was an army driver & he used to be an army driver too...... =) hehehe....

truly, by the grace of God, i passed with a demerit point of 16.... btw, tt red car nearly made mi failed.... but thank God tt im safe back home now... finally i can juz relieved from the spending of money for my driving lesson & test.....

Thank God for this wonderful moment.... i think if my dad is still around, he'd very happy to hear my gd news.....

no, wait... he's happy now.... thank dad, for the wonderful blessings!!=) Love ya!


recently, facebook is so popular among all & probably we would forget abt going into friendster to look for online frenz.... anyway, i juz got addicted to facebook cos there's so much interactivites.... i supposed to do my tutorials on fri, but ended up playing wif facebook for the entire day..... if i din do well in studies, it'd probably be facebook's fault..... =P

its been 53 days since my dad passed away... im sure by now tt my dad knows tt he's dead, according to chinese tradition... last fri, when i went down to visit my dad at the columbarian, i couls sensed tt my dad came back to say goodbye to us.... mysteriously, it rained after we got back from the columbarian... i guess tt was the way he expressed his sadness & hurts..... had this feeling tt he was still around, hugging us.....

after tt day, my mum's room door spoilt & couldnt be close tightly.... normally, her door is always easy to close & lock, but now its doesnt... weird huh?? i guess my dad still miss my mum... so much tt he wanna see her every night...... =)

still, the tranquil peace of seeing my dad's ashes laying at the columbarian in a nice environment makes us even more happy tt he can finally rest in peace.... =)

dun worry, guys..... im fine.... perhaps juz pondering abt some "weird" things my dad did....


It is time to accept things for what they are.

There are some things that just cannot change, no matter how hard i try.

It is time to admit this to myself and move on....


last nite, i got to see someone which i missed him alot for now.... in my dream, i was standing at the door, probably had the feeling of seeing someone familiar.... true enough, i saw my dad, smiling at me..... after so many weeks, i finally get to see him in my imaginary realm.... he wore his favourite suit wif the yellow long-sleeves shirt.... the tie tt he wore during the family photo shooting...... he looked so pleasant..... there he was, smiling at me...... =) i had so much to tell him how happy i am, starting my sch term in SIM.... how thrill i am being certified by MOE in the AMIS scheme.... i missed the times when we sat down in the living room for chat......

my sis passed me a photo album which was taken at vietnam upon the 2nd day of my dad's death.... once again, i saw his body, ready to bring into the casket... although it wasnt tt much for the photos, but it brings me to a clearer picture of the account my sis & my bro-in-law had on tt particular night when they saw my dad's body brought out from the mortuary.... from the album, i could see my dad's business partners & friends around & i realised there were so many people my dad knew for the past 15 yrs in vietnam..... those who had helped us alot thru the hard times......

sorry for being so emotional again...... life still has to go on....







btw, do u know tt Dilbert comic strips illustrates mainly in office scenerios??? even our lecturer encouraged us to read his comic strips..... hahahaha... =)



yup... its now 0545 in the morning.... 2nd day of Oct....

i dun normally be online at this hour but I JUZ COULDNT GET TO SLEEP!!! the worst is: im gonna be at Ping Yi Sec later from 9am-5pm, replacing a residential trainer who is on leave today... in addition, i was wif the guys from Mastereign last nite & i hanged out wif them at the pub... u can say i was a little drunk, but not too drunk... ramesh couldnt let mi go off from the pub & insisted tt he bought mi another glass of strongbow, after having a kennys & the strongbow pine.... well, i had fun wif ramesh, jinder, alan "the entertainer" (we'll always tease him without fail), soffian, Jez & her husband Kelvin... i was thinking tt i wont hav tt much fun since im gonna start sch soon.... =(

speaking of sch... my SIM term is officially on the roll now... once again, im a student..... i missed my student life back in poly... played computer games in the lab during lessons, eating in labs, mugging on my assignments for long hours..... missed doing 3D animations from my final yr proj.... those were the days....

thank God for having my studies back on track... despite of going thru hard times now, im still able to pursue my degree after my NS... thank God for the mercy & grace upon my life.... =)

enough of all these for now.... gonna take my bath soon..... tired manz.... =(

born 27th Nov 1984
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